my version of transparent, collaborative leadership...with a Teamann twist

#empower17, step out of your lane! Initiate conversations!

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I have the benefit of being at the annual ASCD conference, #EMPOWER17, this weekend, and as always, there are so many incredible things to learn and to see.

But the best thing that happened today? Completely random and happened because I just have no social fear. We were walking back and forth down one of the hallways deciding where we were going to next and noticed a passionate conversation that I finally just couldn’t help but just jump into. Like literally, stopped and said, “Hey, what are ya’ll talking about because it looks incredibly interesting.”

It was real talk, ya’ll. It was about impacting parents, impacting students…it was about changing the world when the target of change keeps moving. We talked about how very hard leadership is, no matter what your population looks like. We talked about the dangers of vulnerability, in evaluative settings. Of the inherent dangers of having a plan, sharing that plan…and the bravery it takes to make that plan happen. It was intense, and it was amazing. And all because I’m bouncey and random. 

Be brave, edufriends. If you’re at #empower17, step out of the comfort zone of the people who you know. If you’re at a conference, MAKE CONNECTIONS. Be willing to initiate conversations, regardless of the lane you find yourself in today. You never know when you might develop a relationship, learn a lesson, or get a burst of inspiration. Angela was so impressed (Do you know Angela? She is pretty darn amazing.) that she’s going to meet back up with Ms. Hairston this weekend and have her on her “Truth for Teachers” podcast.

I hope you’re following along the hashtag, #empower17, there is greatness being shared! And if you’re feeling brave? Share something too!

 

tweetingly,

Amber

 

Don’t forget…relationships should include parents too! What do parents want from a principal? #IMMOOC

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I am a relational leader. I am casual to a fault. I can’t help but build connections, which leads to relationships, which leads to a MUCH BETTER LIFE FOR ME. I have the benefit of having the VERY best parents in my Whitt Wolf world. One of them Mrs. Stacie Smith is not only a parent I respect  & admire, but our daughters are firstie besties as well. I decided to ask her, given that she does have 4 children, three of whom I will have had the pleasure of principaling, what she thought about the importance of relationships. In her own words, here are the 5 things she wants her children’s principal to know. After that, will follow the 5 things I want all of my parents to know. ( Yes, this goes over GC’s 200 words. Yes, it SO worth it!)

Here’s Stacie:

With 4 children, I have had the opportunity for that first day of school a number of times.  They usually all feel pretty similar, though the hand holding has stopped with my oldest two – they would probably die of embarrassment … Some uncertainty on the child’s part … Some worry on mine … Me placing my trust in those who will teach and lead and guide. Now I won’t ever go on record as saying I liked or even listened to the Spice Girls, but in collaborating on this blog post, the Spice Girls’ song with the ever-famous line, “So tell me what you want, what you really, really want…” may have come up – now was this for good blogging purposes or just for an excuse to break out into Spice Girls song? … Who really knows?

 

Got this song stuck in your head now? …  Going to be singing it all day? … You’re so welcome!

(Amber comment: See? Don’t YOU already love her too???)

What do I really, really want in my child’s principal?  I’m sure that list is a little different for each of us, but here are 5 things I’d like my children’s principals to consider:

1. I want my child’s principal to know my child.

Please know my child’s name.  I realize and understand that you are charged with the care of many students, but my child will know who you are.  My child will look up to you.  My child will want your approval.  My child will want you to be happy with him/her. If you know who my child is – if you can call him or her by name – then he/she, regardless of age, will feel loved.  My child will feel a part of something.  My child will feel connected to you.  My child will feel important.  My child will want to do better and will want to be better. Know your students.  Know what they’re going through.  Know what they struggle with.  Know what they excel at. Create a sense of team, of family, of unity.  I truly believe that when you are able to come to know a child, then – and only then – can you guide a child. I have never taught in a classroom.  I have never sat at the helm of a school and been in charge of hundreds of students … but I have watched my own children with different principals, and I have seen the impact a principal that genuinely wants to know his/her students can have.

2. I want my child’s principal to keep my child safe.

My child will be in your care for 7+ hours a day.  The most important thing to me is my child’s safety and that my child returns home safe and sound – physically and emotionally.  Please take measures to ensure that safety and make the safety of your students a priority.  Do your best to protect students from things that would not only harm them physically but that could harm their minds, their self-worth, and their innocence.

3. I want my child’s principal to love being a principal.

Be a principal because you genuinely love these kids and want to do all you can to help them achieve their potential.  Your love for or your disdain for your job is contagious and can be felt, and it will set the climate at your school.  Set a climate at the school that makes students and staff feel happy, safe, needed, appreciated, encouraged, and excited.  Be visible.  Be accessible.  Be supportive.  Be at events.  Be outside welcoming students in the morning.  Smile and laugh, encourage and love, discipline and direct.

4. I want my child’s principal to communicate.

Maybe it’s just me, but when I ask my kids what they did at school, I usually get the answer, “Good.”  Wait, what?!  Clearly you didn’t even hear the question, because that answer was for a completely different question!  Getting information out of my child is not always successful. Communication requires both speaking and listening.  Keep parents informed of what is going on at school – events, programs, testing dates, picture days, policies and procedures, etc.  Parents want to know what’s going on with their children at school.    Have an effective and a consistent way of communicating with parents, and communicate from many different avenues – email, voicemail, social media, flyers.  Listen to your parents.  Get feedback from your parents.  Have a parent advisory council where you can run new ideas and programs by a variety of parents to get insight and where you can get feedback on how things are going.  Let parents be a part of the team.

5. I want my child’s principal to value his/her teachers.

The teachers you hire will have the most contact with and potentially the biggest impact on my child.  Hire teachers that love to teach.  Value your teachers.  Realize that just like your students, they all have different personalities and different strengths.  Lead in a manner that pulls those personalities and strengths out of them.  Let them know they are appreciated.  Give them honest feedback.  Help them grow when growth is needed.  Inspire, encourage, and guide them.  Show them you value them by listening to them.

Each September, I send you what is most important to me.  I have trust and faith in you.  I am here to support you.  I will cheer for your accomplishments and rally for your successes.  I thank you for all you do.  We share in the same goal – to help these amazing kids realize their abilities and achieve their potentials.

Ya’ll. Is that not SO powerful?

Here’s mine…without a Spice Girls tie in, 🙂

1. I want my parents to know how seriously I take my position.

I don’t take myself too seriously. (Again, I am casual to a fault.) But what I do? Each and every day matters. Each interaction I have with you, or your child, is important. It could be the ONE time I speak to/with you or the 500th…it is still so important. It’s important that you know that you can come and talk to me, and that I am going to take you and your concerns very seriously. What matters to you, is important to me. I am a PROUD principal. I am HONORED to be where I am. I know some AMAZING people who would love to sit where I am blessed to sit every day, and I won’t ever take that lightly. That doesn’t mean that I won’t dress up or be silly with my Wolves, because I also take their LOVING school, very seriously.

2. I want my parents to know how much I appreciate their role in what we do.

I can’t do my job alone. More than that, I don’t want to. I am a firm believer in a collaborative style of leadership. If the smartest person in the room, is the room, then parents? I want you in my room! Who knows your child better than you do? Who is going to fight harder for your child than you will? No one. I see you up there, decorating, filing papers, having hard conversations. Mommying and daddying your hearts out. I see you.  There are 667 Wolves enrolled in my care, as of today. (I know this number, each and every day. Why? Because every.single.one.matters!)

3. I want my parents to know I trust my teachers and while I will ALWAYS listen to them, I will also go to my teachers with concerns.

As a professional, I recognize there are always three sides to every story. (Four sometimes if there is a kindergartener involved!) I will 100% listen to every single concern, situation, or question you have. But I will also 99% of the time go straight to my teacher when we are finished. They are on my front lines. They know the context of the situations, they know the dynamics of their classrooms. I value what my teachers do and the power in what they do every day. I will always have their backs. That doesn’t mean I won’t do right by you, but I will also try to do my best by them.

4. I want my parents to know I am doing the very best that I can, but I know I can always do better.

There is no manual with this position. Even after having been an assistant principal for 5 years, I can say I learn something EVERY day. I would like to think I get better every day.  I read books like a crazy person. I’ve chosen to surround myself with learners, some of the nation’s best principals via my learning network, and have our superintendents on speed dial. By going to conferences and speaking on leadership, I am actually growing myself, which makes me a better leader for you, our staff, and my students. I never want to be “all finished” with learning how to be the very best principal I can.

5. I want my parents to know I am a wife & mom too.

I have a teenager, my beast. I have a first grader, my TsT who keeps me on my toes. They are active girls, who deserve to have me at their events, at their celebrations, and awake in the evening. I am probably the meanest wife in the world, because by the end of the day, I have nothing left. I am asleep by 9pm. I say that it’s a good thing I’m cute & funny, because domestication tasks are NOT my gift.  Although, MT would tell you I’m actually not that funny!   My point is that I am like you…I have a life, responsibilities. And despite those, I am still 100% committed to being the VERY proud principal of my Wolves. Sometimes I may just need you to help me balance it all..

Which, actually, brings me to this.

Separately, we can only be so successful. But together? We can, and will, change the world. Do it…with me.

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And, yes, a Spice Girls song to help seal the deal.

 

 

Stacie, THANK YOU for writing this with me. I appreciate your truth, always.

Sharingly,

Amber

 

The importance of a mentor as an educator, regardless of what year you’re in…

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It’s that time of year…the time of postings and of opportunities. I love when people reach out and ask for my perspective on how to handle certain job interviews or whether or not take a risk in a new position. Branching out can be a scary thing but it can also lead to some of the best professional growth around! Having a mentor, someone you can call to help you process at this time of year, or actually, any time of year is one of the easiest, most helpful things an administrator can do.

I had a call this afternoon with a young lady who is about to interview for her first principal position. Her first step, in reaching out, already says so much. Seeking out someone, whether as a formal or informal mentor, says a certain thing about her. She is willing to hear feedback, to ask questions. Rather than think she is all-knowing and all qualified, she is wanting to see what other perspectives she should be thinking about. Do you have a mentor? A mentor isn’t someone you meet with on a weekly basis…or have a set, rigid schedule with, that’s a therapist. A mentor is someone who sees value in you and what you to offer. They are willing to help you get to the next step on your ladder. These relationships are crucial, especially to those in leadership because there is no substitute for having “been” there. Someone who has walked the path before you can help you avoid certain pitfalls, or help you see that those pitfalls aren’t the end of the road. If you’ve done this for ten years or for two, there is value in having conversations about what we do. It solidifies what you believe in, and reinforces what kind of leader you want to be.

Some other things to keep in mind, if you’re on the interviewing path:

  • Experiences speak. Personalize examples from your world when asked a question.
  • Be prepared. Know who you are talking to and if at all possible, what matters to them. I take the time every time to respond to an email about a position, using their name, and wishing them luck. Even when they haven’t actually looked into knowing who I am, or what my Wolf world is about.
  • Recognize that you won’t know it all, and aren’t expected to. One of the main things I’ve learned is that is way more important to be WILLING to learn, than the appearance of that you’ve learned it all.
  • Team player. Be a team player. There is an MVP, but that person couldn’t have gotten there without their TEAM. (Side eye, Tom Brady.)
  • Be yourself. If they don’t want the real YOU, then you don’t want them. I am so incredibly thankful for a district that allows me to be me. I haven been given many snippets of advice in my 15 years and some of what stands out the most was the critical feedback given about things that fundamentally made me, me. I can’t imagine the difficulties of leadership while also trying to be someone different, how exhausting!

Remember at the end of the day, what we do is more than a job. It’s a passion, it’s an obsession…especially to those who are great. Or want to be great. Great is not at every door, or to be found within every interview. Recognizing that you want to be better, and that even opportunities that don’t go your way, can still be considered a learning experience will help you get that much close to your version of great. 

 

 

 

Going for great,

Amber

My growth is in a different place: self efficacy as a leader #IMMOOC

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Reality check: Through your evolution as an educator, you will find yourself at different stages of growth. Recognizing and owning that your needs and strengths are going to evolve is critical to maintaining not only your sanity, 🙂 but also your trajectory as a professional.

An easy example… Early on as a teacher, I couldn’t get enough of books,resources, websites to support my lessons and instruction. I just couldn’t wrap my mind around creating my own resources from scratch. Over time, I found myself reaching less and less for all of those amazing Scholastic books, and developing what I felt like my students needed for success. When I am supporting teachers now, I use a whole different strategy of support and creation.

While attending a conference recently, I made the comment to a favorite principal peer of mine that I had guilt for not attending of the “how to’ or “try this tomorrow” sessions, and found that my deepest thinking came now from reflection of conversations…whether they be at 3am over a laptop and laughter or over a shared dessert at lunch…those were the moments that stretch who I am and what I believe. Instead of needing to sit and get, I find myself in need of conversation and reflection. Sessions didn’t grab me and hold me like they had in the past. She responded with what may be one of the smartest lines ever, “Your growth is just in a different place.”

My growth is in a different place.

I am at a professional stage where the lens in which I view things is different. When beginning my “technically Teamann” journey, I wrote about classroom technology integration. I gave handouts, I created how to videos, I was very detailed in my processes. My growth was in a different place. Now I am in a thinking/leading/principaling stage. I need to hash out thoughts and strategies. I need perspective and thoughts from peers in my administration trenches.

Recognizing where my campus is and what our expectations are, I have to be careful not to be guilted or feel pressure from other admin about their challenges and needs., that look different than mine. I also have challenges. I also have needs. My growth is in a different place. Not an easier place. Not a harder place. There is enough stress and enough success to go around. What looks like a win to you, manifests and looks differently as a win for me. And that is ok. My growth is a different place. 

Last year I isolated myself. I didn’t go anywhere, I didn’t participate in my voxer chats, or twitter chats. I silo’d myself. I focused solely on learning my building, my people, and all my Wolves. Which is ok. My growth was in a different place. Now that I feel like I have a grasp on what this principal job, somewhat can/should look like, I find myself thirsty to get back out there, to continue my growth. Taking part in George Couros’ s IMMOOC this time around is just the jump-start I need to keep pushing myself.

Know who you are. Know what you need. Reflect on where you are in your journey. Own that. And then? Get where you need to be to grow. If you’re on autopilot, or don’t feel challenged or don’t feel that you are successful, get in a different place, a place where your growth IS.

 

growth focused,

Amber

Expecting vs extending grace as a leader…

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cop

Have you ever been pulled over? This may surprise you, cough cough, but my driving style is a lot like the way I talk…and write. Fast and furious, always trying to get somewhere. Last weekend, with an unexpected afternoon of sunshine, I was out running errands, and inadvertently didn’t pay enough attention to a new posted neighborhood speed. When I saw those lights, gulp. My first immediate thought was, “Ohhhhhhh, MT is going to kill me!’ The second was, “Ohhhhhhh, please don’t give me a ticket! Just a warning, just a warning!”

Luckily, I did just get a warning that day. As I was driving away, I thought how ironic it was that as administrator, working with both adults and students, I am a big rules/policies girl. I like to know the parameters of an environment/situation and think that they are in place for a reason. I’m quick to want accountability and feel that individuals should be held responsible.

But when I get pulled over, my first instinct is to want grace. I want to explain, to rationalize, to make sure you understand the circumstances.

I was so much more cognizant of my speed this week. I was appreciative of the chance to do better. I was respectful of the officer’s power of a punitive action, but that he chose to give me the benefit of a learning experience. Had I gotten a ticket, would I have reflected on it so objectively? Or would I have been bitter and resentful? Been annoyed as I watched others fly by, getting away with their hurried pace, while I sat as the “one who got caught”… been focused on more of the consequence, than the actions that I had done to get myself there?

I don’t know for sure. But it definitely made me think about how I handle situations on my campus. Do I want the reflection, or do I want the finality of a judgement/consequence?

I know what I want for students…and myself. That surely transfers…

It was a very poignant reminder that as a leader, 

I have the opportunity to give grace, and that more can actually be accomplished by doing so.

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Reminded,

Amber