my version of transparent, collaborative leadership...with a Teamann twist

Leadership Lessons from Lyrics: Embracing the Anti-Hero Within

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This is week two of “Leadership Lessons from Lyrics…did you see last week’s post? Loved the comments on Facebook, X, and even on IG of how it resonated with all of my leader peeps. So glad it’s not just me who feels like brutal honesty is NOT how we want to give…or receive feedback!

This week the lesson that has popped up ALL week long is from “AntiHero”, by the TSwift.

It’s me, hi, I’m the problem, it’s meAt tea time, everybody agreesI’ll stare directly at the sun but never in the mirrorIt must be exhausting always rooting for the anti-hero

I’ve been replaying these lyrics in my mind all week…and it baffles me that self-awareness isn’t a cornerstone of every leadership training program out there. Team members and leaders who can openly acknowledge their own shortcomings set the example for a culture of humility and ongoing learning among their teams and colleagues. It builds an environment where it’s okay to fess up to mistakes and learn from them. However, if you’re in a place where no one seems able to admit they’ve dropped the ball, it will impact the culture, eroding trust and fostering resentment. And when things hit the fan, that reluctance to own up could seriously hinder open, honest communication.

If the expectation is that leaders should step back from the spotlight in times of success but step up in challenging times, shouldn’t this principle be practiced consistently?

Is an unwillingness to accept fault based on a lack of confidence or fear of consequence?

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Being able to acknowledge that you don’t know everything and are willing to reset, regroup, and try again is crucial in education. Every situation and student (or staff member!) is different. They are coming to the table with different experiences and therefore, a different lens.

Just because you are in charge doesn’t mean you always get it right.

When a team member consistently refuses to acknowledge their mistakes, it can diminish both trust and respect. People tend to follow leaders who are honest and transparent about their shortcomings, as it makes them more relatable and trustworthy. By openly acknowledging mistakes, you’ll model a growth mindset and resilience. This behavior encourages others to admit and learn from their errors, fostering a culture where learning from failure is not just accepted but encouraged. It demonstrates that making mistakes is a natural part of the learning process, not something to be ashamed of.

Acknowledging mistakes is the first step toward correcting them and preventing similar issues in the future…which your team needs to hear.

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The phrase “I’ll stare directly at the sun but never in the mirror” suggests that while you’ll take on other people’s issues, and be willing to tackle tough challenges with others, but aren’t so willing to do so when you are the one making the mistake. Growth as a leader means you have to be willing to check in with yourself as well. I know that ego plays a part in this, and am willing to acknowledge several times that it’s gotten me tangled up as well. I think transitioning from a position where I felt confident in what I was doing to a completely different “lane” of education has allowed me quite regularly to admit that I need help and support. Balancing that with the confidence of leadership feels awfully antihero.

It’s not just about steering the ship with a steady hand; it’s also about being brave enough to admit when we’ve hit rough waters because of our own doing. This journey of self-reflection and acknowledgment isn’t just for the brave or pop singer—it’s for every leader/team member aspiring to foster an environment of trust, risk-taking, and innovation.

Here’s to embracing our inner anti-heroes, learning from our missteps, and leading with a mix of confidence and humility. Can’t wait to see where next week’s lyrics will take us!

Staring at the mirror &

Embracing Humility: Learning from Unexpected Sources

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When I talk about this space and what I share, I am always quick to mention that it is primarily a place where I share what I got wrong and my reflections on the experience in hopes that others could learn from it.

I’ve even blogged about my lack of experience in new professional settings…especially that first year, all the things I got wrong…or this gem from 2017 (lil’baby leader Amber!)

I was reminded this past week, even in all my glorious middle ageness that I STILL have so much to learn and how open I need to be to the possibility of just being…wrong. I had the opportunity to be the opening keynote for an Opal EdTech/EduAcademic event that was held in Orlando. Orlando…where I can get a DOLE WHIP? In.

Orlando is also where one George Couros lives. George often refers to himself as my big brother in this edtech/leadership space. 13 years ago we connected and it has been years of banter, fights, and political punches. I adore his family and he has been a huge cheerleader for my beast in her early education endeavors.

George is also the person (other than MT) whose feedback I am most sensitive/resistant to. I, of course, blame him because of his directness and lack of empathy when delivering any of his hot sports opinions on what I’ve shared or written.

So when he asked if he could come to hear me speak, I immediately said no.

I was ADAMANT that any feedback he was going to give me would be hypercritical and it would make me so self-conscious…why would I want to invite that panic into my head? George speaks to massive audiences ALL the time, literally, weekly…I do it 4-5 times a year. I didn’t want to hear how…not George…+ I was. Of course, I caved, and “allowed” him to come.
Thankfully, the evening went well and I didn’t fall down. 🙂

Ya’ll. His feedback was sincere, purposeful, and beneficial. The suggestions he provided, which were about what I could have further emphasized or made more impactful, proved to be incredibly helpful. The way he recommended connecting with the audience at the end will genuinely change how I close moving forward.

All that to say…man, was I wrong…AGAIN.

(which is just so annoying! That makes George right…again.)

What is the resistance to being better? How big is my ego that I can’t accept hearing what could potentially be true and helpful, just b/c I am scared of it being critical? How often do I miss an opportunity to be better… just because?

Why do I resist having confidence not in my knowledge, but in my ability to learn? 

One of my purposes in education is to help others be more than they think they already are, and sometimes that means DIRECT FEEDBACK. And yet…am I willing? Do I come across as willing?

Such the hypocrite I can be…

George wrote a fantastic blog about the ability to soak up the greatness of those around you. Give it a read. Don’t be like me, be open to hearing how you could be better …even if it’s not delivered in a pretty complimentary package with a bow. 😉

I hope you have people in your life who challenge you, not for the sake of them being right, but for the sake of making you better. And may you always be willing to let them.

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Begrudgingly better &

Amber